


Five Times Miles Didn't Kiss Him (And Once Alex Did)

by orphan_account



Series: Du erkennst mich nicht wieder [5]
Category: Last Shadow Puppets
Genre: Boys Kissing, Friends to Lovers, Implied/Referenced Cheating, Light Angst and Fluff, Loads of The Little Prince References sorry, M/M, TAOTU era
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-04
Updated: 2020-10-04
Packaged: 2021-03-07 23:14:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,260
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26825716
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Sometimes in the heat of the moment you just had this urge to kiss your mate and it should be forgivable. Maybe.
Relationships: Miles Kane/Alex Turner
Series: Du erkennst mich nicht wieder [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2081118
Comments: 4
Kudos: 39





	Five Times Miles Didn't Kiss Him (And Once Alex Did)

Five Times Miles Didn't Kiss Him (And Once Alex Did)

1.

Miles could still lay out every moment of that specific afternoon for reconstruction, each second detailed and well-remembered, just like the strings of his guitar – Alex Turner stepped into the cramped changing room when Miles was busy tuning his instrument. As Alex slipped inside, noises filling the room peaked, and Miles’ heartbeats suddenly decided to join in. Miles was left shocked and almost scared afterwards, not knowing why out of nowhere, he was very much distracted by the presence of the other boy.

Alex fetched Eva for a chat. Half of the time he peeked at his own toes, avoiding her eyes, but somewhere in the middle of it, he’d look up and smile with confidence, speaking in a pleasant voice. He didn’t notice that Miles was drilling holes on his skull.

When Alex turned, he turned to Miles. It was a _God-sent_ coincidence, and by the time Miles remembered that he should introduce himself, Alex was already smiling, fingers dancing timidly in front of his crumpled T-shirt. “Miles, right?”

“Yeah…'nd you’re Alex.” He muttered. The sentence came out surprisingly cold, and he regretted it right on sight. Alex was taken aback, completely unprepared for his rudeness. Miles didn't think he was angry though, for some weird reason.

Alex tilted his head back to Eva, now talking to a bunch of people at the same time. “I quite like the last song.” Alex paused, then started to hum: _Put your dukes up John_ … Eva laughed and began to sing along.

 _Listen to him_. Miles had heard him singing, not for the first time, but somehow much clearer than that. His head buzzed. This one must have come from _somewhere else, like The Little Prince._

The ridiculous thought got Miles back on Earth, singing happily himself. Alex glanced over when Miles walked towards him. His eyes widened, the eyes of a scattered brained teenager, suddenly burned bright and fiercely, fixed on Miles’ lips. For a few seconds, Miles could only do the same, until Alex chuckled, complimenting his singing.

Miles was shaken awake instantly. For all night he had been trying hard to forget about the urge to kiss his new friend.

2.

Soon he realized his connection with Alex was even more special than he thought it could ever be. Alex talked to him. He talked _nonstop_ and this would not be seen around anybody else. They exchanged the eureka moments about music with such devotion, as if those were words of love.

 _What would others think of them?_ Alex mentioned that he wanted to cover their song after the third night of the tour. He then asked Miles to show him the chords. Eva was smirking when he stole Miles away. She shrugged mysteriously.

“How about you two just go form a bloody band?” Matt would say that, slap Alex on the shoulder, and nod at Miles. It was supposed to be a joke, but Alex stared at the table surface right in front of himself, pondering. His thought took a trip to somewhere far away, so Miles’ attention was also drawn to something other than the song he was supposed to be writing.

He wanted to press a kiss to the little pout Alex had on while he was musing, which should never be this attractive no matter what.

They found themselves five minutes. Alex watched him attentively as Miles’ fingers moved on the guitar strings. They sat side by side, on a kitchen table, on the tour bus, or on the stairs next to the stage. Alex watched and talked to him. He treated Miles like right now he was the only one existing in the whole world. “Wait Mi, play that bit again…”

They were sharing much more than just the summer air, Miles thought (hoped). He changed a chord next time when he played the tune. It made Alex beam. There’s something about him that made Miles’ chest full of melody. He needed to do nothing but being honest and true, _like a tamed fox in the rye._

Miles wrote down another line on the paper. It grew out and reached beyond and kissed Alex’ mind for him instead.

Miles figured it was not simply about sparks of creative ideas, feelings, or sexual desires. He felt Alex was closer to him than any other living souls, even when he had suppressed anything that wasn’t appropriate to be there. When it came to Alex, he always craved an intimacy that reached far deeper than a touch with fingers, but somehow when he received it, he still wanted to _touch._

3.

Alex called and it was about a girl. Of course, all the tears could only be shed for a girl. They were on the phone for half an hour. Miles mentioned that he might quit the band and let the flames go out. The name of his next journey temporally dispelled Alex's misery.

“The Rascals?” Alex repeated it once. He picked out the irony and humour in it just by the way Miles drawled. They both laughed. Alex’s voice was sometimes closer, and sometimes farther way. Miles could picture him passing the receiver from one hand to another. Alex did that whenever he was stressed or a bit down.

They went back to talking about the girl. It was raining heavily outside. Miles tried to think about warm, dry summer nights. Alex talked quietly. His narratives created a surreal beauty out of thin air. _The Little Prince was in love._

The next time Alex called, he gave Miles a name and a fact that he was now in a steady relationship. He sounded happy.

“Alexa?” Miles mimicked what Alex did last time and repeated her name. Alex answered with a strategical silence, until Miles reluctantly opened his mouth once again and finished this cliché for him. “Found yourself a rose, huh?”

 _Something like that –_ He heard Alex’s soft reply. The joyful gentleness in his voice was dreamy and pure and meant for someone else. What a miracle: One could fall in love, heart filled with delight. Miles only knew love from yearning and heartaches. For a moment, he felt jealousy sizzling inside, taking his voice away.

Alex changed the topic himself. “I wrote a song.”

Probably a poem for her. Miles guessed bitterly, but this time he got it wrong.

“I’m thinking maybe you can come down to the studio and do the guitar line, yeah?”

“What?” Miles gasped.

“When you have the time, man. Of course, if you don’t wanna, let me know. Tune’s called 505.” A shuffling sound, a few small talks, then Alex’s voice came back. He sang to Miles the first love song he’d ever written.

“That’s it for now.” Said Alex. “I tried to record it a couple of times, but it was just a bit lacking. I figured I’d call ya…so, what do you think?”

 _What did he think?_ Wherever this song was born from, no matter it’s about a girl, a story, or a depressing breathless wintery night, anything – Miles envied it. He wanted to be on the other side of the line, right next to Alex to kiss those lips that could sing love, passion and pain, but in reality, Alex had just found someone who made him happy. Miles was not stupid enough to make the move.

He settled with “bloody brilliant, la” and promised he would come. In return, Alex promised him a welcome party.

4.

All the “five-minutes” backstage finally added into a few rolled-up pieces of paper, written full of lyrics and melodies.

“We did this bit last year, didn’t we?” Alex wondered aloud, lips pursing as he dived deep into memories. Next to him sat Miles, who drank too much wine that his fingertips start to tingle. Alex then pointed to another section. “You wrote this yesterday.”

Miles nodded along. The few lines below were written by Alex last month. They had surely made some progress. It had been a while since they first started to do it, taking an record of everything they came up with backstage on tour, neither of them bothered to think what they were gonna do about those pieces.

“I feel like…it’s time.” Alex murmured. The city light of London tinted the blue horizon into deep purple. They were just sharing the first clear night in the New Year. Alex looked up to catch Miles’ reflection on the window. While he stared, the magic of the lights turned his eyes into stars.

“Let’s make some music.”

“Sure.” Miles agreed. Slowly he blinked away the dizziness, smirking. For many times he had heard that people found Alex hard to understand. But Miles never thought him as confusing. Most people just didn’t know how to listen and see, but Miles certainly had learnt the trick. He whispered, “I can’t wait, Al.” And that was it.

Alex seemed rather excited as well. They observed each other on the clear glass, shoulders and knees touching, fingers almost entwined. There was no need to sit this close as they were not in a crowded bus or tiny changing room. But as this point, the contact itself became a conversation. They talked in silence. Nobody could do what Alex managed to do, wakening something deep inside him, finding the pieces nobody had noticed before, holding his truth casually like this.

Miles turned his head slightly so that Alex’s forehead caressed his, breath warming up his skin. _He could get closer._

He didn’t do it. By now, Miles had known that he loved Alex, but if Alex got up and left right now, going back to her, Miles would not crumble into nothing. He just became all alone. Solitude wasn’t news when Alex wasn’t around.

Miles could stand him not being here. He could stand not keeping him close, owning him, becoming one with him, because Alex was destined to go away, and Miles had accepted it way before realizing that he was helplessly in love with his best mate.

Alex said his goodbye before midnight.

Miles stayed in the wheat fields.

5 + 1

Dazzling lights blurred the audience. Alex turned back to him with a smile, bathed in hot air and cheering shouts. Miles run towards him. As they were leaving the stage, Alex gripped his hand and pulled Miles towards himself. They rushed forwards mindlessly, almost knocking over someone else’s equipment. The staff members around mistook their weird excitement for being complacent, and Miles felt like explaining to nobody.

He wanted to celebrate, because now they had made a dream come true and shared something special with each other. He wanted to scream and shout and sing and kiss Alex senseless. However, with all those people around, all Miles could do was to hug Alex tightly, holding him close to his chest.

They went out to watch a few bands playing. Afterwards, they attended the afterparty together, joint by the hips, until Alex dragged him out for a smoke.

Miles was the only one who actually did pull out a cigarrete, strangely. Alex was humming, head shaking from side to side. He looked proud, content but somehow melancholy at the same time. Miles wanted to write a thousand songs just so that he could remember this forever.

“How was it?” Alex asked abruptly. Miles passed him the half-finished cigarrete. Alex took a long drag, balancing it between his fingers.

“It’s amazing, Al. Best day of my life.” Miles said.

“Nah, a bit early to say that, don’t you think?” Alex winked at him. Miles wanted him to know that it could never get better than being with him on stage, that it was more than enough to make Miles Kane the happiest person on earth. But he didn’t know how to arrange the words.

No love was purely enjoyable. Miles had to admit. His heart was squeezed tightly into a ball, pressured by unknown sorrow, while beating eagerly because he cherished the moment as well. The smoke rose up, masking Alex’ face, the one Miles could recognize out of numerous faces with one single glance. It had been a long time since he glanced at anyone else. He was afraid that he could never regain the ability.

Alex pushed the cigarette right in front of his lips as if that was a mic they were sharing. He was musing again, eyes distant and full of emotions. “Miles,” He resumed. “I understand.”

Miles remained motionless, Alex’s name hesitating on the tip of his tongue. Panic started to rise up when he realized what was going on. Miles desperately sought for a lie. He could find none. Alex gazed at his face fiercely. Once Miles thought he knew every move Alex was about to make, but now he wasn't so sure.

Before he could beg for forgiveness, Alex threw away the stub, the only thing in between Miles and him, then leaned in, quickly landing a dry kiss on Miles’ lips and swallowed his gasp. 

“How was it?” Alex challenged him again with the same question. Hidden in his eyes was a hint of uncertainty, but Alex was brave enough to ask. _He was marvellous._ Miles thought, completely stunned. A man like this must be from _somewhere else._

Instead of answer the question, Miles blurted, "I love you." 

Alex smiled him a sigh of relief. He suddenly seemed very young and extremely happy. "Is that so?"

 _Yes._ The answer echoed in his head, loud and firm _._ Miles smiled back.

_God yes._

**Author's Note:**

> It's been a while. Hope this isn't too bad. Please don't hesitant to let me know what you think :)
> 
> Thank you for reading!


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